Many teenagers and young adults are choosing to abstain from sex these days and for any number of reasons. Certainly, there are several benefits of abstinence. Even if you have had sex in the past, abstinence may make perfect sense at this point in your life, both for your physical and emotional health.
However, sexuality is prominent in society today through all media including television, movies, magazines and books and is rampant on the internet. Because sex is so predominate, practicing abstinence can prove to be a difficult task. So you must find positive ways to cope with sexual urges and practice abstinence with success.
Stay Focused
Even if you have to do it every day, remind yourself the reasons why you chose abstinence. It can be all too difficult to remain abstinent in a world that is driven by sex and you may find yourself in doubt about your decision. So strengthen your resolve by reminding yourself all the good reasons you made the right choice in the first place.
Sometimes, it can help if you write your thoughts out, an abstinence journal if you will. By writing down the reasons you chose abstinence, you can look back, read them and remind yourself why you made the choice.
Consider the Advantages
When you are at your weakest or if you are feeling pressured into having sex, stop and remind yourself about all the advantages abstinence holds. Many times, this will help you feel more secure in the choice you have made to practice abstinence.
Think about your own health, refraining from sex is the only foolproof method of preventing pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. And when it comes to mental health, choosing not to have sex eliminates the depression and anxiety that comes with having premarital sex or sex with the wrong person.
Think about how abstinence benefits the emotional aspects of a romantic relationship, leading to more heartfelt discussions and getting to know your partner on a deeper level.
You want to also consider that when you aren’t focused on sex, you accomplish so much more in your young life. When you are not focussing on sex, you are focussing more on school, relationships, your family and outside projects that are not only fun but will take you far in your life.
Be Strong
There is simply no way to avoid sex entirely in our modern society as sexual charges media, like television and movies, are the norm. If you are in a relationship or even just out on a date, you might find yourself feeling sexually charges. But remember to stay strong.
If you find yourself in a difficult position, remove yourself from the situation. For example, if you are watching a television show and things are getting sexual, simply change the channel. If you and your partner are making out and you feel tempted to take the next step, stop for a moment and consider your commitment.
If you are tempted by sex, think about what will happen if you do have sex. After it is all over, you have gained nothing positive and will probably not feel very good about yourself.
Support
You aren’t the only one who practices abstinence. It can be very helpful to find a network of like-minded people who can help you through difficult times. If you are practicing abstinence for religious reasons, there are sure to be weekly meetings or seminars where you can discuss your commitment. There are also plenty of online resources available where you can hold discussions or ask for help.
Talk With Your Partner
If you are engaged in a romantic relationship, make sure your partner knows your boundaries. Talk frankly and often with your partner about the reasons why you chose to refrain from sex. Be as straightforward as possible so there is no confusion. Explain to your partner why abstinence is important and how it will positively affect your relationship.
There are various levels of abstinence. There are some people who wish to avoid physical contact completely while other people allow some contact, like kissing or cuddling. It is important that you explain your boundaries.
Lastly, plan out your dates and talk about what you will do. It also helps if you plan on doing things together that will help avoid temptation, like hiking with friends and doing volunteer work.